I don’t mean to interrupt, but I have a question.
You’re not interrupting at all. What’s on your mind?
Well, on some mornings I come here for coffee and sometimes you are here too. Each time, you are nearly always smiling when you meet or are talking to someone or at least you seem to be smiling. Not big and wide, but just enough for me to notice. So, to put it bluntly, is it real?
Yep, it is. No way would I just paste it on. It comes from deep inside. It definitely is the real me.
Okay, I get that. But, and this is going to sound awkward, that causes me to ask why that is.
No one has ever asked me that question, and frankly, I don’t have a good answer. On any particular morning, I guess it depends on what might have already happened earlier that day or maybe because of what didn’t happen. A big help is that I never begin my day by listening to or watching the news. That’s one of the best ways I know to instantly feel bad. I’d much rather reflect on the good things closest to me such as the great marriage I’ve had and the fact that our two kids turned out so well.
I’m glad you said that because it goes well with my own thinking. Anyway, go on.
Well, another thing is that I’m always giving myself credit for what I’ve done with my life, plus, and this is really important, I’m willing to be responsible for all my wrong turns and screw-ups, especially those that cause other people pain. I think somebody wrote a song along that same line, like never having to say you’re sorry.
I know, but everybody makes mistakes.
True, but instead of admitting what they did wrong, many people shove their screwups onto somebody else or some condition. Not accepting responsibility leads to a lot of disagreements and friction that should never have seen the light of day. Far better to swallow hard, admit the wrong, tell yourself you won’t ever do that again, and keep growing. Refusing to do that often causes war in families, in companies, and even in nations. It might not be true but somebody once said that anyone willing to do a lot of research would discover that every war began with a single person.
I’ve heard the same thing, but go ahead.
Well, wars are now a special worry because we no longer fight with spears but with weapons that can wipe out thousands of people in minutes. The point is, I can’t do a thing about that, much less worry about it. So it is with most issues such as poverty, hunger, hopelessness, ignorance, and whatever else that makes the news. All of it is beyond my control. Look, all I really have is myself. That’s all you have, all that anyone has.
I guess what you’re saying is that the only thing anyone can truly control is themselves.
Exactly, except it goes beyond that.
In what way?
Well, there are two perfectly logical points to consider. First, setting a good example is important. It’s surprising and often downright humbling how you can affect someone just by being someone they would like to be or have always wanted to be. And second, everyone should leave a legacy, and I don’t mean money. Instead, I mean something a lot more personal such as inspiring a person to take full advantage of their God given talent or sharing your experiences with young people who can use your wisdom in making those life changing decisions that only they can make. Said another way, if you try to exert power over them they will walk away, but empower them and they will hang onto your every word.
I think I‘m now beginning to understand why you smile so much.
Yep, that’s good, except just like everybody else, I have my down days. The difference is I make sure I don’t stay down. You know that old saying, go with your winners and forget the losers.
Well, on that positive note, I’ve got to leave and get on with business. But I thank you for your time and insights. I sure didn’t expect that kind of answer to such a simple question. You know, of course, that when I see you again, I will definitely expect to see that smile.
Of course you will!
